Wednesday, October 19, 2005

This is two days work. The one onthe bottom shows what I did yesterday. I had a difficult day that day: a lot of interruptions to my work and not enough time to paint. I got frustrated at the end of the day and just started throwing paint, working instinctively rather than thoughtfully. I was tempted to wipe out, but Tom thought it looked great so I kept it. Today I had plenty of time to paint and the light in the studio was good. I worked for hours modeling subtle flesh tones and articulating the amazing dynamics of the shoulder girdle. I was able to think in a calm and organized way about what I was doing and at the end of the day I thought I had done pretty well. But when I see what I did today next to what I did yesterday I feel that what I gained in drawing and subtlety I lost in movement and light. I realize that what I want for my work is to have it all: the freedom and passion of my irrational gut feelings and the elegant subtlety of my ordered and rational side. I swing from one approach to the other trying to find the perfect balance.

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